I write my children birthday letters every year. The last full day I spent with my children was Sharvahn’s glorious 11th birthday. That night I penned an ‘interim’ letter which I read to her the following morning before she set off on a journey from which she has yet to return.
I am grateful for that tender memory – I cried as I read to her, she smiled and hugged me. It’s incredible to read that letter now. As I was helping her connect with her father, he had already planned to separate us forever.
I hope I have Sharvahn’s permission to share this letter with you – a love letter from mother to daughter. To Sharvahn – I miss you terribly sweetheart. Please come home.
My sweet Sharvahn,
Yesterday we celebrated your first power year – 11! May there be 11 more power years to come.
This morning you will leave for three weeks to spend with your Baba and Grandma Lynn. My heart hurts a little, well a lot, but my intention is to focus on my excitement for you at the adventures that lie ahead in Europe’s finest cities.
I’m sorry I didn’t get to write your birthday letter before you left. Just so you know, this would not be my first belated letter – in fact I skipped an entire year in 2013 due to unforeseen circumstances!
Your letter will await your return. It will sit alongside a list of friends who called and visited asking to hang out with their BFF, an invitation to dinner at the restaurant of your choosing, and a collection of items that I couldn’t resist for you in your absence.
Please go to your Baba’s strong and hopeful. Understand that he is doing his best and that his love for you is communicated in Persian cookies, Kurdish stories, and epic Netflix watching. It doesn’t mean that it is any less pure or beautiful. Through him, you can learn that love comes in a multitude of shapes, colours and sounds.
And while I often claim the biggest ‘love’ territory, I know that it’s a crowded field. You are loved and adored by many. For this I am proud and grateful.
Cherish your life. Live large and kind and courageous. Be good to your siblings, they love you so.